Open Letter

Dear Creepy Guy,

Hey it's me, the girl that you hit on very suggestively every time she takes out her trash. Not that I'm not horribly attracted to dumpy aging losers but your charms are just not working on me. I am now avoiding taking out my trash because you fucking creep me out. So great, thanks creepy, I have a trash problem.
Sincerely
Uninterested Girl